I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize