they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I color on your dick again?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize