I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
this hospital has no fireball
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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