oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
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