i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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