Ketchup is God's man juice
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
