people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
