the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
