They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
