I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
