Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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