We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
where does the pee come out of this thing
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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