just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
