i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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