So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
