But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
