We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
