I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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