I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
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