90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
