Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection