If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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