they need to just BURY HIM!
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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