He is an equal opportunity slut.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
