im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize