Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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