Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
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