Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize