This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
