She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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