Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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