Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
