Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize