i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
