i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
