My room smells like vodka and shame
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
