Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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