He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
