Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
