theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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