Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
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