College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Someone shattered a urinal.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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