I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Randomize
