just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
