so explain again why im purple
no
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
