How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
