I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize