saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
