That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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