Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
