Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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