I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
